Blog of Captions from New Yorker Cartoons

• "I'm sorry, I thought we were seeing the Ring Cycle tonight."
• "I prefer lawyers with less MSG."
• "I told you, I haven't seen your checkbook!"
• "Well, this is certainly going to put a crimp in our vacation."
• "What's that stegosaurus doing in Sach's?"
• "Bagel, smagel! I want that penguin!"
• "This school play seems like a mix of Ingmar Bergman and D.W. Griffith."
• "Is this the mustache I walked in with?"
• "Waiter, there is a mortgage-backed security in my soup."
• "I'm going to be honest: you're not the first therapist to mention the banana suit."
• "I think my dog-walker is turning Rex against me."
• "Your ultrasound has revealed your child's gender and Twitter name."
• "Don't give me that old 'a shark is attacking me' routine. I'm not budging."
• "Well, it's raining umbrella's again."
• "I wouldn't remarry him, but I'd definitely redivorce him.
• "Can I call you back? My laptop has to meet its therapist in half an hour."