The Day of St. Barnabius goes back to 213 AD, when Roman's attacked and killed a young man, Barnabius, as he preached to several Arcutians (near present-day Karvida). The Romans dragged Barnabius for several miles before finally stabbing him many times in the eyes and rectum, alternating between the two. Just before he died, however, Barnabius's body exploded in a holy ball of fiery vengeance, killing the Roman soldiers. Today the Day of St. Barnabius is celebrated by baking sugar cookies.April 7th: The Day of St. Bleeding Cake
In 1412, in Leipzig, Germany, a cake made of fruits and nuts was baked by a peasant woman whose name has not been preserved. Before the cake could be cut into, the sides of the cake started to bleed. News of this confectionery stigmata quickly spread far and wide. At this point the stories diverge. Some claim that the cake was taken by some crusaders on their way to Jerusalem (but never made it farther than Turkey), and there it was eaten while the crusaders were under siege. Other stories claim the cake was sealed away in a chest to be presented to the King Rupert, but after 3 days the chest was opened and the cake had vanished. For the next year, several people reported cake-based miracles. The Bleeding Cake was canonized in 1836. Today the Day of St. Bleeding is celebrated by giving pennies to the homeless.
August 25th: The Day of St. Charles the Rectifier
The Day of St. Charles celebrates an English noble, Charles the Archduke of Hastings (b. 1307; d. 1369), who bravely rounded up and tortured several hundred heretics living within his domain. His methods of torture were spoken of far and wide for their extreme cleverness, severity, and slowness to bring on death. He was canonized in 1941. He is commonly known as "the Rectifier" to show how he rectified the rampant problem of heresy on his lands, and to separate him from St. Charles the Bloodthirsty. August 25th is used to celebrate St. Charles the Rectifier. Celebrations typically involve eating a breakfast of ham with a smiley face drawn upon it in hollandaise sauce.
October 19th: The Day of St. Luke of the Mumbled Defiance
Little is known of Luke of theMumbled Defiance's early life. In 912 AD, he tried to spread Christianity to the Magyars (in present day Hungary). A local chiefton of a tribe of the Karpad, distrusted Luke and ordered him to be crushed in a manner common at the time: a stone would be placed upon the victim's head, and the executionar/confessor would ask the victim to give up. After several stones were placed atop Luke's head, a slight mumble arose from beneath the stones. It was assumed by some of the people present that Luke was professing his defiance to the chiefton and his eternal acceptance of Christ. More stones were placed upon Luke's head, and he was crushed. The Day of St. Luke of the Mumbled Defiance is celebrated today by wearing a piece of streamer from your back pocket.
No comments:
Post a Comment